Water is the single one most stupid substance on earth. Even dumber than rock... It doesn`t have a will of its own, it`s just pure stupid. There is no brain activity or thinking proccess here. It just floats around and follow whoever wherever. The wind, heat, cold, gravity all take advantage of the water and it doesn`t even seem to mind. This is how stupid water is. You can even drink it and it doesn`t care, not even when you piss it out again. Totally ignorant to humiliation. It doesn`t seem to be aware that their nearly dominating the planet. Their fucking everywhere. In the sky, the ocean, the wind, icebergs and you can`t tell the fucking difference between the raindrops cause they all look a like. Its like looking for a needle in the haystack. And its wet to so your gonna be all sucked up if you get in touch with it. But it goes away, it doesn`t leave any watermarks or anything.
Like air, it has no control over its shape, speed or movement. It can drown a continent without being aware of it only to fly off into the air and travel with a cloud to the other side of earth and carpet bomb another continent with drops of rain. Most times it actually rains on itself. Playing both sides as the attacker and the attacked. Nearly genious strategy cause you always win, problem is you also always loose.
To sum it up. Water is so low in the food chain it doesn`t even know how to eat. It can`t even boil itself without the help of fire. One thing is pretty amazing though, that it somehow doesn`t fly past the clouds when it goes up in the air. If it took the whole ocean with it it would leave earth pretty dry:-)